Not going Swimmingly well....

Jharkhand is hosting the 34th National Games which begins in less than one month. So, a swimming camp has been organised for the 40 member contingent in Ranchi. Actually inside an appartment in Ranchi. Truly, if the report in the Statesman, 26th January 2011, is to be believed.

Apparently, they lie down on the floor and thrash their arms and legs about. Simulating swimming. The report also adds that nearly half of this contingent have never seen a pool having practiced in ponds and lakes.

I had to reread the item to make sure it was not a joke. Ofcourse, I almost missed this article tucked on Page 15, amid various articles on cricket.

So what? Nothing I guess. India's pride has already been salvaged, hasn't it? The rooms and facilities at GWG 2010 were found to be acceptable to all foreign visitors weren't they? GW games were for International teams, afterall, so the swimming pools for training would have been pools with water.

The Jharkhand swimming team, is like Oliver, asking for more. How dare they?

[Ps - I dont think they asked for a pool. The report stated that they felt demoralized. What an understatement that].

A sporting chance

All the brouhaha about the CGW Delhi 2010. The paw prints on the bed, the leaky roofs, the Rs. 6000 toilet rolls. Would it ever get finished on time? Will it meet "international" standards? Will the international athletes approve? Will we as a nation, be able to rise to the ocassion?

Well the answers to all of the above was a resounding yes.

However, it struck me as terribly terribly sad. I was not angry or upset at the rest of the world questioning India's ability to organise such an event. Every question just made me sadder.

Look at all our Indian athletes and sportspersons. Does anyone in India ever think of them? Has the government shown an iota of concern for them? Why should Indian athletes have to wait for CWG for world class stadias and facilities?

We should have been disqualified at the very outset. We are one of the most unsporting nations in the world. Except cricket. No, I am not talking about the sportsmen or athletes. Look at the pitiable state of affairs in regional or even national sports. Look at the outlays, the facilities, the total apathy. Ours sportspersons are handicapped even before they can begin.

And despite it all, they performed and how; making us proud all the while when we were humiliating them by raising a hue and cry for facilities for international athletes. I apologise to all of you - you are the real sports, all of you.

Seeing the medal haul, there I was thinking that perhaps things will look up for the non cricket sports and sports persons in India.

However, just days after the closing ceremony, we find a buzz about the boxing arena in the Talkatora stadium being removed to make way for the AICC meet. The boxers for the Asian Games can well box else where. Afterall, they are not really used to such "international" facilities are they? And these were not really for them, were they?

Not much Kolkata in Knight Riders

And there it was: Sourav won't be the captain of Kolkata Knight Riders - rotating or not. Brendan McCullum it would be.

At once the IPL balloon punctured for me. I was amazed at what I was feeling. I tried telling myself that its only a game and one which to my frequent angst gets way too much attention than any other sport in India; that it will be over in a month or so and life will simply move on for everyone including Sourav. And there are more important things in life. But I couldn't dislodge the stiffling pall of gloom which descended. I didn't feel like indulging in a screaming, shouting angry rant against everyone (real or imagined) who was responsible for it. Lost some interest in IPL.

What's left in KKR then? Only the KR? SRK's KR? John Buchanan's KR?

I did try to leave work early to catch the 2nd match last night and made the mistake of telling the auto driver to go super sonic fast: which he did: and had all of us speechless with fright - but I came home with 15 minutes to spare. Watched Chennai lose to Mumbai, saw Dimitri Mascarenhas's fantastic bowling in the first over. And yet that thrill I felt at the last IPL wasn't there. South Africa must have fantastic facilities, everything ship-shape, no power failure (like at Edens last year) but somehow -- that crazy passion wasn't there. Just not the same as seeing it happen in your own hometown (and not only at Eden, but anywhere else in the country), the hordes of manic about cricket fans. That palpable excitement, buzz, build up, the collective agony and ecstacy...not there.

I will be watching the 1st KR (and not so Kolkata KR) match tonight. (hurt and betrayed as I feel...eeeks....can that be me? Aparently it is....despite my telling myself its only a game)!

Hockey Hogs Headlines

Since yesterday, hockey has upstaged cricket as a newsmaker: Pick up a paper or switch on to any news channel.

Alas it took a debacle to get it the attention long long overdue: India's failure to qualify for the Beijing Olympics.

But it won't be long before the dust settles and all eyes, ears, bytes and columns are full of the upcoming IPL cricket series. India, it seems has "Chucked" Hockey, our National Game.

Its just not cricket

India’s current series in Australia, the umpiring decisions, the racist comment(s) controversy and now the IPL bids … cricket is always big news in India and more so now. Naturally, the news of the winning bids for IPL has been hogging headlines everywhere. Shahrukh Khan, Vijay Mallaya, Ness Wadia and Preity Zinta all wining the bids among others.

Naturally, the fate of the Indian Women’s Hockey team got mere mention. Returning to India from a training camp in Australia, the team had to spend a chilly wintry night in very shabby accommodation.

Also, they were unaware of a Rs. 5 lakh grant for purchase of equipment and so they had to shell out their own money.

So despite the appeal of “Chak De” and SRK and the women’s hockey team winning the hockey world cup in reel life, in real life, its cricket all the way.

Run Buddhia Run

On Tuesday 5th of May, 2006, Buddhia ran 65 kms from Puri to Bhubaneswar in 7.02 hours. All the news channels were full of Buddhia and with reason. He is four and a half years old.

When his father, a beggar, died, his mother sold him for 800 Rupees to a hawker. But he was rescued by his coach. He runs 50kms twice daily. And has run from Bhubaneswar to Puri more than once before. The CRPF who sponsored this last run, wants to adopt him.

He is the new “wonder child”. Now, which bit of this statement should I wonder at? That 4 year old Buddhia ran from Puri to Bhubaneswar? Or that it took him only 7.02 hours? Or he ran in the blistering summer heat of Orissa? Or that he is the youngest marathon runner in the world? Or that he made it to the Limca book of records? Or at all of these put together?

I am sure his coach is taking good care of him. But to me, childhood (and Buddhia is a child) is for other things. He probably is made of sterner stuff. But having seen the talent in him, he should be given a chance at a normal paced childhood, keeping the training for an age more acceptable. Four and a half means he is not in Class I.

I am wondering. But not in awe. I am wondering at the sadness of it all.

Rules for Watching Cricket

Bengalis take their cricket very ,very seriously. Try watching a match at Eden; a capacity crowd of 120,000, not counting those hanging from trees and atop all the tall buildings around Eden Gardens, for each and even when India is not playing**. (But perhaps I should not generalise like this for the 60 million Bengalis, in West Bengal). At least we do. And our ex-neighbour. We have invented all sorts of rules for ensuring an Indian victory. Never mind the fact that our success rate has been very bad. Nevertheless the set of rules continues to grow and grow.

I don't think I missed a single match at Eden Gardens between 1991 and 1996. And the few matches I missed, I had R tape it for me. For matches abroad, the match timings would take precedence over our lives. Ma would set the alarm to catch the 4am match between India and New Zealand! She'd get up a bit before, make tea and then settle down before the TV to watch Sachin beat the hell out of the kiwis in the first 15 overs. Yes. those certainly were the days.

I remember our neighbour dropping in early one morning to ask if she could watch the match on our TV.

'Of course. Any problem with your TV?' ma enquired politely.
'No, no. We are waiting for Bonu (their daughter) to come home and switch on the set. India always wins when she does', she said in all sincerity.

Ha. Ha. Imagine that. But lately I find that we have our sets of incredibly complicated rules as well.

The other day, as I was lighting an incense stick at the family puja altar, ma came bustling and replaced the match box, the incense stick and other stuff in a certain way.

'Ma, what are you doing?'
'India has a match today' came the all explanatory reply.

I immediately understood that these were Baba's rules. Earlier, he would wear his lucky lungi to watch the match and so ma had quite a job of ensuring that the same lungi was washed, dried and pressed for the next day's session.

Things have gotten a bit complicated since then. Most of the time, we are not allowed to watch the match. Baba sits like an ageing Royal Bengal tiger, remote in hand, in front of the set occasionally tuning in to check the score. And that's it.

'Baba, you cant be serious'. I shout in desperation.
'But I am. It works,' says Baba.
'Well if you have so much power, why don't you find out a way whereby you could get me a nice job by perhaps rearranging the furniture or something,' I say.
'Don't be ridiculous,' says Baba, in a very final tone .

This morning I was helping ma to change the bed linen in our room. The pillow cases and bed sheets done, we, we picked up a fresh bed cover when ma stopped and said

'Oh, Oh'.
'What' ?
'Can't change the bed cover. Not before the next test series (India has lost the first one and how). Baba's instructions'.

And she put the old cover back and briskly moved leaving me standing jaw dropped. (Its easier to agree to Baba rather than discussing it).

Normally Baba is a very rational man not given to any sort of fanciful flights. In fact he is boringly practical except cricket. But then India's performance of late has been so dismal. Desperate situations call for desperate measures. Perhaps it does work. Perhaps our rules for a win are getting cancelled by others non action or contra-actions.

Who knows? The truth after all is somewhere out 'there'. That could include a host of things...ETs, ESP, time travel, the truth about life and death and winning in cricket.

**(Except for that one shameful incidents in the 1996 World Cup against Sri Lanka);

SHAME

The olympic torch came and left. We sure have a unique way to show our interest in the Olympic games. Filmstars and big brand sponsorship. I was in the vicinity on that day and the place was awash with posters of a cola giant and an electronic brand some sort of sponsors of the event. And the line-up of celebrities who would carry the torch were filmstars and couple of sports persons bizzarely from cricket which is not one of the sports in the Olympics. At the end of it all, one would have been forgiven for thinking that it was a film world event sponsored by a popular cola.

A lot of people have protested against this mainly in the letters to editors of various news papers and one of them even suggested that there was a brighter side of using filmstars to carry the torch. Atleast it got people interested in the what, where and why of the Olympics! The Union minister for sports said it was not the centre's fault that we had film stars and not sports men and women carrying the torch after it arrived back in India after 4 decades. Where were PT Usha, Leslie Claudius, Milkha Singh.....Instead we had Rani Mukherje, Aishwariya, Vivek Oberoi....

Well the state of affairs is well represented in our showing at the Olympics....

What a shame. Maybe our sports persons should all emigrate to some other country where they value their sportspersons and do not reduce one of the most hallowed sporting events into a cheap tamasha. I feel tremendously ashamed for this and I as an Indian apologise to each and every Indian sports person.

India vs Pakistan ODI or A vs Me

It is saturday and so we got up late . Dommage. By then Indian innings was 3/4's over and Pakistan had nicely settled in and was hammering Kartik properly by the time we returned from the Saturday marché. 'Chatu baniye diyeche' (beaten to a paste) according to A.

Personally, I prefer matches like this...fiercely fought and which could go either way right down to last ball, to tame matches where the outcome is a foregone conclusion half way through.

We could have seen the match live in one of English or Aussie pubs in Paris but it was a bit too late. Ofcourse these pubs would show India vs Pakistan match provided it did not clash with one of their cricket or rugby matches.

Once, we very nearly did, but changed our minds at the last moment. Thankgod. It was an India-Australia final. Australia hammered us silly. We two would surely have been the only Indians around. So much for patriotism!

Now, we follow the score on the net, more often than not, on rediff.com. We take turns to sit in front of our PC and hit the refresh button. R ofcourse, keeps sending emails with highlights (which player did what and who said what and her analysis) and side lights(our driver wants a day off).

It was my turn to sit first, while A gobbled up his lunch...grilled chicken from the marché while firing questions and comments at me:
- Whats the required run rate?
-'Kichu bojho naa’ (You don’t understand a thing). ETC, ETC
- Cricket kheleycho konodin? (Ever played cricket?)
‘YES I DID. ONCE. When I was 8, the only girl in an all boy team. Only, the boys wouldnt let me lift the bat to score a run. I had to drag it along the ground. And ofcourse they didn’t bowl slowly and so I didn’t score and left in a huff’.
‘OK OK, my 'goonda' rani’.

Then it was his turn. And his responses to mykoto holo? (whats the score) were cryptic one liners like:-
- Khub pittachey (really scoring runs)
- Onek holo (a lot)
- Arey kichu hoi ni etc. (nothings happened) ETC, ETC, ETC.
This was my turn to let him know what I thought of his cricketing talents if he couldn’t even read the score.

India is winning / no it isn’t / Pakistan will make it, Remember Miandad’s 6 off the last ball of the last over? /we lack the will / our bowlers are pathetic ETC. The atmosphere was as tense out here, as was in the Indian dressing room, I bet. And so on….till the last ball of the last over, when Pakistan lost by just 5 runs. I even felt a bit sorry for them. Am happy that India has won but not that gloating kind of happiness usually associated with India – Pakistan matches.

And now peace reigns in our little household. India won, all our tensions eased, A is taking his siesta…further analysis on hold till the next ODI.

Glossary French Words
Dommage - Pity